Friday, 24 April 2015

IN FULL BLOOM


When I see you, I see so much light. I see all that you have to offer the world. You are buzzing with untapped potential, it surrounds you like an aura. Your goodness seeps through, leaking onto the pavement, brushing against leaves, leaving trails of light wherever you go. I see flowers blossom when your shoulders brush past their buds. 

I am waiting for you, my delicate bud, to blossom. As I know you can. And I have given you all I thought you would need to grow. Love, commitment, care, kindness. Yet you stay clenched in your little space, terrified of stretching your petals, of letting the light hit your skin. Of blossoming. 

I have done all that I can, dear friend. Now it is your turn. You must look within yourself. Your lack of self-love breaks my heart. It shatters me. What made you believe you were worth so little? Who dared tell you that you must sacrifice yourself time and time again for a scrap of affection. Who convinced you that you are worth nothing without the love of another? Who had the foul audacity. 

You are an individual. A whole entire human being. With a good heart and a strong pair of lungs and yes both have been battered and beaten and bruised but you are still standing. You fought your way through. The world has ended for you more times than I can recall yet you wake the next morning. You dress. You walk. You talk. You fight. You go on. 

You are a warrior. Can't you see? The world notices nothing but your smiles, but I know you are crippled inside. I know this life has exhausted you, yet you keep going. My dear friend, your strength is utterly overwhelming. 

You are worthy of such respect and admiration. Yet I see you on your knees, begging. Begging. Begging for affection and acceptance from those who will forever take you for granted. 

You cling onto empty promises made in the heat of the moment. You cling onto those promises when their actions beg to differ. When their actions hurt you. When their actions tear you apart. 

Can you not see that you are worth so much more?

My blossom. Look deep inside you. Find the kind of strength that will help you love yourself. You must learn to see your beauty in your darkest moments, and in your solitude. Not just when others throw the words carelessly at you. You must learn to be at peace with yourself. To enjoy your own company. You must learn that your hobbies and your passions are important. You must learn to prioritise yourself over others. You must learn to stop sacrificing your health, education and happiness for the sake of others. You must learn to put yourself first, always. 

My blossom. The world is only a terrifying place if you convince yourself it is. You let others crush you, forgetting that you have just as much right to this world as they do. You let the world shake you. And though you keep going, you must also change your opinion of yourself. Once you do, you will never let someone break you again. You will never let someone convince you that you need them, that you cannot live without them. You will see right through the promises made in the heat of the moment by those who aren't worthy of your devotion. You will see they are empty. 

My blossom. If you saw yourself the way I see you, you wouldn't hesitate to walk away from disrespect. And if someone dared lay a finger on you, you would grind their bones to dust.  

My blossom. It is time to be brave. It is time to see that you have so much within you to offer the world, and to keep for yourself. 

You are a whole entire human being. Your existence matters. 


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